The world of work can be a competitive place. We inevitably compete with others for jobs and promotions, and businesses compete with others for trade and market position. Much of this is inevitable and, to an extent, healthy, as it drives improvement and excellence. But unfortunately, many people take this competition too far and seem to think they are competing with everybody all the time. This is especially true when leaders think they are competing…
I have long been aware of my difficulties with sleep – and where I do not struggle. Being middle aged, I wake up several times during the night, but once I have been asleep, I rarely struggle to get back to sleep quickly. However, getting to sleep in the first place is a whole other story. I can be absolutely exhausted, struggling to keep my eyes open, yet as soon as I turn off the…
I went to a concert last week. Despite nearly bottling out, I really enjoyed it once I got there. But one thing became very clear to me very fast: my confidence in doing things on my own is at rock bottom. It is not that I can’t do things. I just feel very uncomfortable and self-conscious doing them alone. At the concert, I was acutely aware that everybody else seemed to be in a couple…
There are many misconceptions about autistic burnout, and I believe that some of them, ironically, come from taking the term too literally. To me, burnout means your tank is completely empty, and you can’t function at all. But autistic burnout is not like that. Many of us run in a burnt-out state for weeks, months, or even years. It means we appear to be managing, but underneath we are always living right on the edge…
I suppose it had to happen. Just when autistic people were finally starting to get just a little bit of understanding and a fraction of the support that we need, as well as just a tiny bit of understanding that autism might have positive aspects, somebody got unhappy with all the attention we were getting. I say all the attention. When you need support, it still feels like getting anyone to take notice is an…
In a few weeks, I need to complete my tax return, and I dread it. This makes no sense for several reasons. First, over the last few years, it’s been extremely easy, and nothing will be different this year. Second, my day job is in tax, so I really shouldn’t be afraid of this task. I am not worried about paying the bill, as I am meticulous about setting aside more than enough to cover…
I have felt a deep sense of shame for most of my life. I have felt ashamed that I cannot do things that others seem to find easy, ashamed that I am so different, and generally ashamed of my entire existence. Much of this I put down to being in an unhealthy relationship combined with undiagnosed neurodivergence, but I now learn that there is more to it than that. A recent study has found that…
A diagnosis of autism later in life can provide a lot of answers, but it can also mean spending many years before the diagnosis trying to manage the consequences of being autistic without understanding the cause. For example, I can now see that I have been living with autistic burnout for many years, but I could not identify it as such until I knew I was autistic. This meant I was trying to manage something…
When my wife died, I only took 2 days off before returning to work. I did not have to, and my employer was very supportive. But 2 days sitting around at home feeling awful was enough for me. I knew that further inactivity would have a serious impact on my mental health, and I was unlikely to be able to motivate myself to keep busy under my own steam. So I threw myself back into…
I have known for some time that it is rarely a single problem that floors me. When I face one big situation, I can put all my energy and attention into it. What will always overwhelm me is having to deal with multiple things at once, however small they are individually. What is interesting is how this kind of situation affects my brain. Like many autistic people, I struggle with starting new tasks and switching…